Easter. Christendom’s big day. Jesus rose. From the dead? From a coma? Passover plot? Not going there. Too sensitive. Might antagonize. Blasphemy. Doom my immortal soul. Brrrrrr. Scary, kids. Not going there.
Easter. Pope’s lackeys say he’s getting a bum rap. Ugly gossip. Comparable to anti-Semitism. Uh-oh, politically incorrect. Not going there either. What about all those deaf kids? Didn’t Ratzinger know? Cover-up? Don’t go.
Easter candy. That’s better. Peeps. Jelly beans. Chocolate bunnies. Chocolate eggs. “Chocolate Jesus” by Tom Waits. (Good song, but maybe better not go there.)
Easter eggs. Hard boiled. Mickey Spillane. Noir. Noir eggs? Maybe an Easter omelet instead? What in an Easter omelet? Diced peeps!
Easter seals. Easter otters? Easter manatees? Easter walruses? I am the Easter eggman, therefore I am the Easter walrus.
Easter. Oyster. Venus on the half shell, Jesus on an oyster shell? Definitely best not go there. Jesus’s face on a grilled-cheese sandwich? Or was that the Virgin Mary? Don’t go there. Oyster bunny? Go there later maybe.
Easter bread. (Yeasty bread?) Feast of bread! Beast named Fred. Not worth going there.
Easter, Wester, Norther, Souther. J.D. Souther wrote for the Eagles. Easter Eagles? Easter beagles? Send them into the fields to sniff out hidden Easter eggs like pigs do truffles. Or chocolate truffles as Easter candy.
Easter Island. Rapa Nui. Funny statues. Aku-Aku. South Pacific. Richard Rodgers. “Bloody Mary.” Getting thirsty. Better go there.
Easter. Pope’s lackeys say he’s getting a bum rap. Ugly gossip. Comparable to anti-Semitism. Uh-oh, politically incorrect. Not going there either. What about all those deaf kids? Didn’t Ratzinger know? Cover-up? Don’t go.
Easter candy. That’s better. Peeps. Jelly beans. Chocolate bunnies. Chocolate eggs. “Chocolate Jesus” by Tom Waits. (Good song, but maybe better not go there.)
Easter eggs. Hard boiled. Mickey Spillane. Noir. Noir eggs? Maybe an Easter omelet instead? What in an Easter omelet? Diced peeps!
Easter seals. Easter otters? Easter manatees? Easter walruses? I am the Easter eggman, therefore I am the Easter walrus.
Easter. Oyster. Venus on the half shell, Jesus on an oyster shell? Definitely best not go there. Jesus’s face on a grilled-cheese sandwich? Or was that the Virgin Mary? Don’t go there. Oyster bunny? Go there later maybe.Easter bread. (Yeasty bread?) Feast of bread! Beast named Fred. Not worth going there.
Easter, Wester, Norther, Souther. J.D. Souther wrote for the Eagles. Easter Eagles? Easter beagles? Send them into the fields to sniff out hidden Easter eggs like pigs do truffles. Or chocolate truffles as Easter candy.
Easter Island. Rapa Nui. Funny statues. Aku-Aku. South Pacific. Richard Rodgers. “Bloody Mary.” Getting thirsty. Better go there.
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